When Affirmations Aren’t Enough

Anyone who has been on a journey of living a better life has heard about affirmations.  They’re a powerful tool!  Looking into a mirror and repeating positive affirmations can definitely have some positive impacts on our self worth and self love.  Louise Hay changed millions of lives with her book “You Can Heal Your Life” teaching us that positive affirmations can make tremendous changes in all areas of our lives.  I have tremendous respect for this woman and her work.  I’ve used affirmations with some varying degrees of success.  What I’ve found is that if I’m really in a slump, they can sometimes make me feel worse, like I’m lying to myself.  I decided to try to something different.  During these times, I’m just going to be honest with myself.  Here’s the process that I use:

  1. Be honest with yourself!  Look in the mirror and say “I feel fat.  I really want to be happy in the skin that I have, but today I’m just not feeling it” By stating the thought or belief, we are in alignment with ourselves and no longer feel like we’re lying to ourselves.
  2.  Remember a time when you didn’t feel this way.  When I wore that outfit to work last week, I felt amazing, I know that I looked amazing too and the confidence was shining from my face.  When I completed that project, I know I did a good job and not just because people told me, I was confident with the work that I did and nobody had to tell me that it was awesome!
  3. Gratitude List. Here’s where I run through the list of all the things I’m grateful for, no matter how small or big.  I’m grateful for the warmth of my house on cold winter days. I’m grateful for the money in my bank account that allows me to pay for the things I need.  I’m grateful for my children who can bring a smile to my face even when I don’t feel like smiling.  I’m grateful for the sunshine that helps to brighten my days.  You get the picture!
  4. What I know to be true.  Here’s where I state the positive beliefs I have about myself, the affirmations that I do believe without a doubt.  I am a good person.  I approach everything with integrity.  What I have to say matters.
  5. Set an intention My last step is setting an intention for my day or the rest of my day.  Some examples include:
    • I intend to smile at every person I meet today.
    • I intend to do the very best I can today.
    • I intend to stop the negative self talk when I recognize it.

If you’re going to try this, please don’t stop at number 1!  The magic lies in the following steps! I’m not discounting other affirmations at all and there are many times that I come across a meme or pull an affirmation card that just fits!  This process has become a part of my larger toolkit and I wanted to share it with you!  I would love to hear your experiences with affirmations or this process if you decide to try it! Drop a comment below!